Flesh and Sin Read online

  Had it been a dream? I would know if I’d been bound in chains before. I did have dealings with a sex trafficking ring when I was human. That was how I met Brahm. But I only remember being there for a month before he killed the vampires involved and rescued me with the other girls. I knew something happened that I was blocking off, because anytime I thought about it, it would hurt my mind trying to picture anything during that month. I knew I was fed on at least twice, but never anything else. I only remember opening my eyes one night to find him over my bed. He told me he had changed me and that everything would be alright. That I was safe. I was never given a reason as to why he changed me, but I was grateful. I didn’t care about becoming a vampire; only that I was free.

  “A memory you didn’t know you had?” Diego asked me, bringing me out of my musings.

  “Yeah. I was chained in the dark. That’s all I could see. I’ve never been chained in my life, though.” I stood and began to pace, trying to think about where that memory would come from. The harder I concentrated, the more my head began to pound.

  “Claudia, you don’t look so good,” Diego said and came to stand in front of me. His eyes widened in shock just before I felt something drip down from my nose. “Your nose is bleeding.”

  “What?” I asked in a panic. I wiped my hand under it and sure enough, blood coated my knuckles. “What the fuck is happening?”

  Diego went into the kitchen. I saw him pull a rag from a drawer and wet it under the sink before coming back. He lifted my chin and wiped at the blood. His brows were drawn together, and his lips were set in a tight line. He looked to be deciding something as his eyes flicked over my face. Finally, his expression softened, and he sighed. “You have a memory block on you. A powerful one at that. Every time you try to think about it, it hurts, right?” He asked as he finished wiping my face.

  I nodded. “Yeah. Like a knife is being jabbed into my brain. It started earlier when I was in the feeder room with Abraham. No blood, though.”

  “What were you doing to trigger it?”

  I pressed my lips tightly together, not wanting to admit what I’d done to Brahm.

  “Nothing important,” I answered him. “But this time it was thinking about my past. I don’t remember much. I was part of a ring, but I was only there for a short period of time before Brahm rescued me and turned me. I don’t really remember the people involved or where it was. I just know I have an aversion to letting people touch me without me going to them first. I never felt that way before the ring, but no one ever touched me other than to feed on me during my stay,” I paused, trying to grasp what he had said before. “A block? How do you know? And who would have done that?”

  He shifted uncomfortable. “I’m probably going to be killed for telling you this. But… Abraham put the block on you. He’s an Ancient. Only Ancients have that sort of ability and he’s one of the strongest still in existence. You don’t remember much of what happened during your time there. Something that traumatic would leave a mark. You don’t just forget things like that. It was why he refused to let me speak with you and the reason behind our fight. The harder you try to remember, the harder the memories you’re forcing back will hit you. It’s like tearing down a metaphorical wall with physical consequences.”

  Tears sprung to my eyes once again. I couldn’t believe this. “But why would he do that? Brahm has never hidden anything from me. Why would he do such a thing?” I asked shakily. The hurt of yet another betrayal from Abraham was searing into my chest. I wasn’t sure I could take any more from him. I was on the verge of breaking from it all.

  He shook his head and collapsed back into his chair. “I don’t know, Claudia. I just know that as much as I want answers, there’s no forcing anything out of you. You have to remember everything on your own at a slow pace or risk killing yourself. And I promise you, it will kill you if you force them.”

  And there it was. Not only had he blocked off my memories, but remembering them too quickly would kill me.

  Was there no end to Brahm hurting me?

  Chapter Six

  I couldn’t believe Abraham had set a block in my mind.

  He was the one person in the world that I relied on to always be honest with me and protect me. I wasn’t sure if this block was his twisted way of protecting me from something, but were the memories so awful that he felt I couldn’t handle them?

  After not being able to get anything from Diego, he drove me home to sleep off the killer headache I was getting from trying to remember. I was thankful I wouldn’t have to walk. We didn’t say much on the ride over. All I could think about was the amount of betrayals just piling up from my maker. I wasn’t even sorry for the tease I’d given him anymore because of how hurt I was over all of this. When had life taken such a hard turn into Fuckedupsville?

  I ended up knocking out into a deep rest after getting home. Abraham had thankfully not been home yet. I promised Diego that if memories did start coming back that I felt would be useful to his case, that I’d help where I could. I knew I didn’t remember much about what happened to me, but I also knew that I would do anything I could to take down anyone who would be stealing humans off the streets to sell for blood and sex. Was it really so hard for people to just get a random hook up and buy blood from a donor market? The blood wasn’t as good as from the vein, but it still tasted relatively the same. It kept us alive and that was what was important. Why did vampires have to go to these lengths?

  I fell asleep thinking of all of this. It was no wonder that when I did wake up, it was to twenty missed calls from Lucy. Most of them were yelling at me to call her asap. The last message was what had me in a straight panic, though.

  “Claudia Adams! I am going to strangle you if you’re not at my apartment in twenty minutes! Sloan’s sister got in during the day and is here for the bachelorette party tonight. I don’t know if I can last much longer without wanting to swat her with a damn newspaper! No wonder Sloan never talks about her!”

  Lucy’s message had me smacking me head. “I cannot believe I forgot her bachelorette party,” I mumbled to myself. I was the worst best friend ever.

  I got up and grabbed a change of clothes. When I entered the bathroom, I noticed a sticky note on the mirror with Abraham’s handwriting.

  We need to talk when you get home later. I’m sorry for how I acted. Love, Brahm

  I crumpled the note and tossed it into the trash and muttered, “You bet we’re going to talk, asshole.”

  I quickly showered and slipped into a gold sequin cocktail dress. It was one of my favorites that showed off my curves just right. I paired it with some gold, gladiator heels and did my makeup to match. Of course, I used my glitter, gel eyeshadow to match. My lips were painted red and I spritzed myself with my favorite Victoria’s Secret perfume called Love is Heavenly. I was ready for a night of forgetting all my problems and just having fun with my bestie. Though, with how badly she seemed to want to be away from Sloan’s sister, I wasn’t sure how easy that would be for either of us. If Lucy didn’t like her, we were all fucked.

  I called a cab to take me to her place, not willing to mess up my expensive shoes on the walk over.

  When I entered the apartment, I heard Lucy arguing with the guys in their bedroom and looked over to see a girl I’d never seen before sitting on the couch looking rather bored. “Uh. What’s going on?” I asked hesitantly.

  The girl, who I suspected was Sloan’s sister, turned her head slowly in my direction. I tried my best not to jump back in surprise when her eyes flashed that same gold glow as Sloan’s did. I was used to him going all wolfy. It never scared me in the least bit. But seeing this girl do it actually made me uneasy.

  Her pitch-dark hair and deeply tanned skin were exactly like Sloan’s, but she was about two inches shorter than him and had the body of a fitness instructor. Her eyes had smoky makeup around them, only amplifying the intensity of the gold glow. Her expression was the epitome of resting bitch face. If it weren’t for that, I’d
be kind of jealous of her beauty. And the ability to fill out leather pants fucking perfectly. Who was I kidding? She was a damn knock-out with a bad ass vibe. I was totally jealous.

  “No fucking clue. You must be, Claudia. I’m Sawyer,” she said in a husky voice that sounded as if she growled when she spoke. Were all female Weres this way? I’d never met one, so I wasn’t sure if that was normal.

  Instead of backing down like I really wanted to, I put on a fake smile and cheerily replied, “That’s me! Nice to me you.” I held my hand out for her to shake, but she just stared at it before turning back to staring straight ahead blankly. I shook my head dismissively and walked to the bedroom.

  “What the hell do you mean I can’t go out in this? It’s just a dress, Sloan!” I heard Lucy yell just before I opened the door.

  They all stopped when I walked in.

  “Hey, guys. What’s going on?” I asked.

  Sloan’s jaw dropped at seeing me, then turned heated eyes to Lucy. “No! Neither of you are going out wearing those dresses!”

  Hollis shook his head and put his face in his hands. “They aren’t that bad, Sloan,” he said to him.

  “They really aren’t,” Vex agreed. “I rather like the idea of others staring and knowing she’s taken.”

  “You just like having things that no one else can have. Child,” Sloan argued.

  “Yes, I do. That doesn’t make me a child,” Vex responded smugly.

  “No, but whining about a hammer sure does,” Sloan shot back.

  I ignored the rest of their argument and looked at what Lucy was wearing. It was the same dress as mine, but hers was in blood red. We had picked these dresses out together to wear for tonight weeks ago. We wanted to match, but for her to stand out more. They weren’t that revealing. The neckline was strapless, and it had a sweetheart neckline. The skirt itself ended about five inches above our knees, so our asses were covered. They were sexy, but they were modest enough.

  I put my hands on my hips and interrupted the guys to question Sloan. “What’s wrong with our dresses? And why can’t I go out in it? You’re not my mother.”

  “No. I’m her fiancé and your best friend. You two should cover up a bit more. I don’t approve of either of you going out in these and attracting wondering eyes. Only my eyes can wander on you.”

  I quirked a brow at him.

  “I meant her! Not you!” He defended. Hollis and Vex elbowed him simultaneously. “Oh, and Hollis and Vex can wander their eyes. But no one else!”

  “Why do you care if anyone’s eyes wander on Claudia?” Lucy asked with a huff. “She’s a single, hot lady who needs to get laid.” She turned to me. “Unless Diego helped you out with that last night.” She wiggled her eyebrows suggestively.

  “Diego?” Hollis asked.

  My eyes widened. “Damn it, Lucy! He wasn’t supposed to know I went over there!”

  Lucy slapped a hand over her mouth. “Shit! Sorry, Claude. I forgot.”

  Hollis stepped up to me and crossed his arms. “You slept with Diego?”

  I glared at him. “No! And even if I had it’s none of your business!” I shot another glare at Lucy for spilling the beans and turned on my heel to go back out to the living room. Sawyer looked up with a slightly amused expression as I entered, the glow finally gone from her eyes. “You ready to go? I’m ready to go!” I said quickly.

  Hollis grabbed my elbow and I groaned. “Not so fast, speedy. Why did you go over to Diego’s?” He asked with an edge in his tone.

  I glanced up at him. “To get answers.”

  Hollis’ expression darkened. “Claudia, Abraham forbid him from talking to you and you know this. Why would you still go? Did he say anything?”

  I snatched my elbow away. “I don’t care what Abraham says! It was about me and I had the right to know what the argument was about! Luckily for you guys, I have a fucking memory block in my mind to keep me from talking to you about whatever it is that’s locked away. So, you don’t have to worry.”

  I was angry. I got that it wasn’t Hollis’ fault that Brahm had blocked off my memory. I was just tired of being treated like it was none of my business to know what it was that was blocked. It was my memory!

  “He’s just trying to protect you, Claudia,” Hollis reasoned.

  “I don’t care, Holl. I’m done being treated like I’m glass. I don’t care if it literally kills me, I’m going to get those memories back that Brahm blocked from me. They weren’t his to take.” I looked back over to Sawyer. “Let’s go wolf-girl. Lucy!” I shouted for my bestie.

  “Coming!” she shouted back and grabbed her coat from the coat rack. Sloan trailed into the room with a sour expression. Vex looked like he was excited we were going out to show off our dresses, and Hollis still looked down right pissed at me.

  Sawyer stood and walked over to Sloan. “You are so in the dog house, little brother.”

  “Fuck you, Sawyer. You’re only a minute older,” he shot back. “Watch over our girls.”

  I giggled silently as she gave him a salute with her middle finger and followed behind us. I wasn’t going to lie, I kind of loved her for that. It was always funny to watch Sloan get knocked down a peg. Maybe she wasn’t so bad after all.

  “Which one of you has all that perfume on? You smell like a hooker.” I heard her snark as we climbed into Hollis’ Camaro that we were borrowing.

  I shot Lucy a look as we slid in and she rolled her eyes.

  Okay… she was that bad.

  We ended up picking up Randi, Lucy’s co-worker, before heading to a club I’d only heard about but not been to in the Bronx. It was fairly new, and vampire run much like The Sassy Sanguine. Apparently, it had a much more goth vibe to it than the Sanguine. Lucy informed me the strippers were both female and male, so we’d get to have a little fun away from home. I was happy we wouldn’t be going to our usual hang out spot. The last thing I needed right now was Abraham breathing down my neck while I tried forgetting about what he’d done.

  The place was called Delirium. And boy did it fit with the decor.

  The music was a mix of heavy metal and trance. The lights were strobing between red and purple as the music played, and the floors were an obsidian tile that was so dark it reflected everything perfectly. The whole place was in shades of black and the waitresses and dancers all wore different forms of leather and lace that left little to the imagination. It wasn’t our usual type of place to hang, but it sure as hell looked like fun. I stuck out a little because of my bright outfit, but Lucy, Randi, and Sawyer fit right in with their outfits of black and red.

  “This place is interesting!” I shouted to Lucy as we walked through the crowd towards one of the stages by where some men dancers were.

  “I know, but it was Randi’s idea!” She shouted back.

  We managed to muscle our way through the crowd and find a table that could sit all four of us comfortably. A vampire waitress quickly came to the table and took our drink orders as we settled in. The song Bloodstream by Lolite played over the speakers and I began to sway happily to the haunting tune. This night was exactly what I needed.

  “So, Sawyer was it?” Randi said to Sawyer who sat looking around suspiciously. “Are you here for the wedding?”

  She shrugged her shoulders. “Couldn’t miss my brother getting married. I thought he’d die alone after he left the pack, honestly.”

  Lucy and I exchanged another look, completely blown away by her attitude towards Sloan. Sure, he could be annoying, but he was one of the most loyal and loveable people. He treated Lucy like she was a goddess and me like a sister. What is up with this girl?

  “Then again,” she continued, her tone softening. “Sloan always was soft hearted. We may bicker and get on each other’s nerves any time we actually talk, but I envy his ability to connect with people. It’s not easy doing that with anyone other than our own kind.”

  “You’re lucky to have him as your brother,” I stated quickly. “He’s a good man and you shou
ld be proud.”

  Sawyer raised a brow and smiled. It wasn’t a sweet smile in the least. If anything, it was a challenge. “Whatever you say, sparkles.” Then she turned her attention to the stage as another dancer started his routine.

  This was going to be a long night if we were going to have to deal with Sawyer’s miserable self. Now, I suddenly understood why Sloan hadn’t told us about her until after she called him that day of the siege. I wouldn’t be so quick to tell my friends about a sister who apparently had a permanent stick shoved up her ass.

  Thankfully, Sawyer seemed perfectly happy with just watching the dancers as Lucy, Randi, and I started getting our drink on. We made sure to request a special lap dance from one of them for Lucy after pinning a “Vamp-bride to be” badge on her dress.

  Poor Randi being human got drunk faster than we could get a decent buzz. Lucy had to cut her off before she risked alcohol poisoning after she tried getting on the stage to dance with one of the dancers. It made even Sawyer laugh when the vampire tried in vain to pry the spritely human off him. It was amazing she managed to keep herself glued to him as long as she did having half the strength of us and far more buzz.

  It was turning out to be a great night. I was relaxed and having fun. All thoughts of my recent troubles were floating happily away from my mind.

  That was, until our waitress’s shift ended, and another replaced her.

  This new waitress was human and looked on the verge of passing out. Though, that wasn’t what had us pausing as she took our order for our next round of drinks. Her skin was pale, and several bite marks were seen peeking out from beneath the leather bra and low-riding leather pants she was wearing. It wasn’t unusual to see these marks on humans who worked in vampire establishments; most of them loved serving the vamps they worked for like that.

  This girl, however, looked completely terrified of us.

  She was timid and a bit shaky. Even Sawyer looked worried about the poor girl, who couldn’t have been older than twenty by the looks of her.