Flesh and Delirium_Under the Skin Serial Part Six Read online

  His simple touches were always affectionate, but never crossed a line. He never asked for my blood or my body. Just my company. My smell. My smiles. My voice. He didn't need to ask, though. I soon began to offer him more of me freely. I wanted to share my blood and body with him. He meant the world to me. I fell so hard and so fast for him in those last three months, I'd give him anything he wanted.

  He was my rock. My savior. My protector.

  But if he left, what would happen to me? Would I be left alone, even with everyone knowing he'd be back?

  "Nothing will happen to you, Claudia." Both of his hands now framed my face. "I will kill anyone who touches you. Do you understand me? You will not be harmed."

  Even though I wanted to believe him, inside I felt a sense of foreboding. That no matter what he promised, something would still happen.

  The next night, he left.

  I watched as he drove away from the door of the club; my arms wrapped around myself protectively. It tore me in two to be away from him. I was sad he was leaving, and terrified about the hours I had until daylight.

  "Well, well, well, look whose master has left?" I heard a voice say cheerfully behind me.

  I jumped in surprise at how close the voice was, then turned my head to look at the man whose face would become my most vivid nightmare.

  Rogue.

  I shot awake from the memory, my breath coming out in gasps. I clasped a hand over my racing heart and shut my eyes tight. I tried to block out what I’d just remembered, but it was hopeless. My head pounded, and blood was coming from my eyes, nose, and ears again.

  I glanced around the room and saw I was still in the spare room inside the club. Brahm must have fixed the coffins and put me to rest when I passed out. Thankfully, he’d clothed me. I wasn’t a huge fan of sleeping in the nude.

  My phone lay on its charger next to me. I lifted it to see the time and saw I’d slept through the first few hours of night. I had some text messages, but my head was pounding too hard for me to want to check them. I glanced over and saw the coffin next to me was empty, and I could hear music coming from the club downstairs. Seemed like the night was already in full swing.

  I quickly stood and made my way to the bathroom. I grabbed a rag from the rack and wet it to wipe my face. My complexion was waxy and pale, and my throat was burning with need for blood.

  If I kept bleeding like this every time a memory hit me, I was going to need to keep some spare by my coffin each day. This was getting ridiculous.

  A wave of nausea hit me as the memory of being touched by those clients flooded through. I was caught between loving Brahm even more for erasing them, and hating him for how badly I felt every time they came flooding back. The thought of going downstairs to dance even sickened me. How could I want to dance when that was what I did for them?

  Then it hit me. That was why Brahm never let me do private ones. Not only would that have possibly triggered all this, but it was something I was forced to do while I was human.

  The anger I’d held for him for always being so bossy about my dancing, slipped away. Unfortunately, it also made me hate myself for how often I fought him about it.

  The door to the room opened. I quickly splashed some water on my face and wiped it dry. Brahm opened the bathroom door and leaned against the doorway.

  “You slept through the night and all day. How are you feeling, love?” he asked quietly.

  I set the rag down and turned. “Not too hot, actually.”

  He nodded and looked unsurely at his feet. I couldn’t help walking over and wrapping my arms around him. He gently hugged me with his cheek nestled on top of my head.

  “I’m sorry for ever being angry with you about dancing. I know now. I get it,” I whispered.

  He lifted his head and angled me to look into my eyes. “You remembered? How much?”

  “The first year and up until you left that night. I woke up just after watching you drive away.”

  His eyes flicked back and forth between mine. “Are you okay?” His voice was laced with concern. I could practically see his thoughts turning inside his head as he waited for my response.

  “Not entirely. I don’t think I’ll be able to dance tonight. I just… can’t,” I replied shakily. I shook my head of the memories threatening to come back again.

  “Are you forgetting what tonight is?” He asked with a hint of amusement.

  I looked at him confused. “Uh, what?”

  He let out a soft chuckle and hugged me back to him. “Lucy is going to kill you if she finds out you forgot, love.”

  Oh. My. God!

  I wrenched myself away from him. “The wedding! Fuck!” I pushed past him and swept up my bag from the floor. I threw it open and started moving things around, hoping to magically find my bridesmaids dress. I couldn’t believe I’d forgotten. “She’s going to murder me.” I looked pitifully over at Brahm, who’s shoulders were shaking with laughter.

  “Quite possibly,” he replied. “Luckily for you, I went and grabbed your things while you were resting. I figured you’d need them.”

  I gaped at him in shock, then swiftly jumped into his arms and kissed him. He seemed surprised at first, but then just went with it.

  “You fucking beautiful vampire, you! Thank you!” I pulled away to say, then kissed him again, deeper this time. I didn’t think I’d ever get tired of kissing him. After last night and finally remembering what it was once like between us, it felt as natural as drinking blood.

  He returned my kiss in kind. He held me just like he used to; tenderly.

  He stopped kissing me and rested his forehead against mine. “I’m sorry for pulling away from you for so long, Claudia,” he said huskily. “I wanted to do this every day with you, but I was so terrified of you remembering all those horrible things. You mean so much to me.”

  I leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on his cheek. “I know. I’m not angry anymore. I’m just happy that you aren’t distancing yourself anymore.”

  He set me on my feet and smiled at me. “No, love. Not anymore. Now, go get ready and we can head on over to the venue. I called Lucy and told her you seized again and that we’d be over as soon as you were awake.”

  I grinned widely at him. “You’re the best.” I swept past him back into the bathroom and began getting ready. I was going to need all the makeup I had in my arsenal to cover up how awful I looked. I wasn’t sure I had enough glitter at my disposal to pretty up this ugly mess.

  But I’d sure as hell try for Lucy’s sake.

  “Holy fuck! There you are! I was about to send Vex after you!” Lucy shouted rapidly as I stepped into the back room where all the bridesmaids were set up.

  The drive to the venue had taken about forty-two minutes since it was outside the city. Lucy had wanted an outdoor wedding away from the traffic and sirens, and found a place called Westbury Manor in Westbury, New York. I had walked through and explored on my way to where Lucy was in the manor.

  It was a beautiful estate with a five-acre garden, an open patio area with a large fountain, several trees that were blooming with white flowers as we rolled into the spring season. White, twinkling lights were set up around the perimeter of the patio, and candles were lit on the tables. They even had peacocks frolicking along the grounds. The inside of the manor had several rooms for the bridesmaids and groomsmen to set up in, and Lucy had chosen the biggest for us. It felt nice to be in such a beautiful setting. I was happy she had picked it out.

  She drew me into a tight hug and squeezed hard enough I thought my head would pop off.

  “Jesus, Luce! Think you could ease up a bit?” I asked her as I tried to pry her arms away from my neck.

  She let go and stepped back. “Sorry. It’s the nerves. I never thought I’d see the day I’d get married, let alone to three people. I have no fucking clue how this is going to work.”

  “Uh, like any other wedding just more vows?” I supplied tentatively. I looked her over and grinned broadly at her in
her dress. “You look stunning! I’m glad your dress arrived on time.”

  “Thanks, Claude. I about jumped Sloan’s bones when he brought the bag in,” she let out a breath before groaning. “Oh god, I’m so damn nervous!” She threw up her hands in exasperation and walked over to a lit-up vanity with a bunch of makeup strewn across its surface.

  Sawyer gagged at Lucy’s comment about her brother as she sat in the corner playing around on her phone. Randi slipped on her shoes and ambled over to me as Lucy sat at the vanity and put her face in her hands.

  “She’s been like this the last thirty minutes,” Randi whispered. Even though I knew Lucy could hear, odds were she wasn’t listening at the moment. “Sawyer wasn’t much help either,” she continued. “I’ve never seen such a moody person at a wedding before. She kind of hates wearing dresses I guess.”

  I glanced over at the brooding werewolf. While she did look stunning in the dress Lucy had chosen for us, it was obvious she wasn’t a fan. She kept uncomfortably shifting the tight lace sleeves on her shoulders and glancing at the short, flowing skirt with disdain.

  I loved these dresses. While an all-black wedding did make us look like we were going to a funeral rather than a wedding, they were still gorgeous.

  They looked like mini versions of Lucy’s dress. The top portion of the dresses were thin, floral lace with the top stopping at our collar bones, and the sleeves cutting off just past the elbow. Beneath the lace, the dress started with a sweetheart neckline and had an empire waist. The material was soft satin and the skirt flowed out in a slight poof to just above our knees. Well, mine and Randi’s. Sawyer was a bit taller, so her dress ended right around mid-thigh. I envied her long, slender tanned legs. I loved my porcelain skin, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss being tan.

  “Did she take a shot or anything? Maybe some alcohol will loosen her up.” I asked Randi.

  She shook her head. “Not yet. It might help, though. I have a cousin who was way worse than Lucy on her wedding day. She ended up taking like seven shots of fireball before walking down the isle.”

  “Was she less nervous?” I asked warily.

  “Oh yeah. But she also stopped halfway down and sat in one her husband’s uncle’s lap. It was a bit of a disaster trying to get her to walk the rest of the way.”

  I gave Randi a look. “That is not at all helpful. You should go get her something. Maybe just one shot of something will help.”

  She nodded and left the room. I wandered over to Lucy and laid a hand on her shoulder. “It’s going to be okay, Luce. This should be fun, not stressful.”

  Lucy lifted her face from her hands and frowned. “What if I’m no good at being a wife, Claude? I love them so much and just don’t want to disappoint them by giving bad wife.”

  I snorted, but quickly swallowed the rest of the laugh when Lucy gave me a glare. “Luce, I’m sure you’ll give great wife.” It was so hard to say that with a straight face. “Besides, nothing is really changing today. It’s just a piece of paper and a name change. That’s it. Everything else you guys do together will be exactly as it was before you walked down that isle.”

  Lucy nodded slowly, then her frown turned into a soft smile. She clasped my hand on her shoulder. “You’re right. Thanks, Claude. What would I do without you?”

  I was just about to answer her, when Sawyer decided to pipe into the conversation.

  “Speaking of name change,” she said in a bored tone. “-whose name are you taking?”

  Lucy suddenly choked, and her hand tightened on mine. I turned my head and sent Sawyer a death glare, to which she just smiled at. I wanted to throttle the bitch.

  “I have no fucking clue!” Lucy exclaimed, panicked. “Shit! Claude! Whose name am I taking?”

  I pinched the bridge of my nose, trying my best to control my anger at Sawyer for only just adding to the stress Lucy faced already. “Luce, you don’t have to change your name yet if you don’t know. I’m sure you guys can figure it out after the wedding.”

  Thankfully, Randi chose that moment to enter the room. She had a travel size bottle of vodka and a wine glass filled a quarter way with blood.

  “Sorry, had to find someone to tell me where they kept the blood in this place. The staff is mostly human, so they keep their supply of blood in the wine cellar.” She unscrewed the bottle and poured the contents into the blood, before handing the glass to me. “You’d think with it being a vampire wedding, they’d have already brought all that out.”

  I mouthed a thank you to her and stuck the glass under Lucy’s nose. “Drink this, it’ll help.”

  She wasted no time grabbing the glass and chugging it. Me and Randi exchanged a satisfied smirk.

  “Better?” Randi asked her.

  Lucy nodded and turned in her seat to give us a smile. “I think so. Thanks, Randi. You guys are awesome.” She glanced over at Sawyer. “Well, most of you are.”

  Sawyer grumbled under her breath and went back to her phone.

  A knock came to the door before a woman announced, “Miss Bryant, it’s time. The grooms and groomsmen are in place.”

  “Thank you,” I said loudly back to the woman. I looked down at my best friend and grinned. “You ready to get married?”

  Lucy slapped her hand down on the vanity and stood abruptly. “Let’s do this sumbitch!”

  Me and Randi gave a holler of excitement, while Sawyer just sighed and slipped her phone inside her ankle boot.

  “While I don’t exactly share the same sentiment as you guys, I’d like to get out of this dress as soon as possible. Let’s get to it.”

  We all filed out of the room and made our way towards the garden area where the ceremony would take place. I slowed my pace a bit to match Sawyer’s.

  “You know, it wouldn’t kill you to at least pretend you want to be here,” I supplied to her gently. I didn’t want her to get angry at the advice I was about to doll out. “Lucy didn’t have to have you as a bridesmaid, but wanted to include you nonetheless, because of your brother. You’re about to be family, and I think you would benefit from trying to get along with Lucy. She’s really easy to love if you give her the chance, and she’ll have your back no matter how well you get along.”

  Sawyer glanced sideways at me, her expression showing nothing. She averted her eyes and appeared to be thinking hard about what I said. Then looked up as if to silently pray. Finally, after a moment, she sighed and gave me the first genuine smile I’d ever seen. It actually made her far more beautiful. “Okay, you’re right. I’ll try to rein it in, at least until after the ceremony.”

  It wasn’t perfect, but I’d take it.

  “That’s the spirit!” I said cheerfully and gave her a friendly elbow to the side. She gave me a low warning growl. I held my hands up in surrender. “Not there yet, are we? Okay, cool.” I sped my pace up to walk next to Lucy again.

  She leaned over and whispered, “thank you.” Obviously, she’d heard what I said to Sawyer. Then she kissed my cheek and continued walking.

  The music started, and we got in line at the doors exiting towards the garden.

  Randi went first and grasped Ricky’s waiting elbow, then slowly began her walk. It was adorable seeing him gaze at his wife so affectionately as they made their way towards the three grooms. Sawyer went next, taking the elbow of Bishop Bentley. I was a bit surprised to see he was one of the groomsmen. He didn’t strike me as a man who would willingly volunteer to be in a wedding. Why had I not asked Lucy who they were before? And damn, Bishop looked good in a suit! It actually baffled me he could fit all that muscle so neatly into one at all.

  I couldn’t help noticing that his gaze lingered for a moment on Sawyer before they started their walk down the aisle. She was completely clueless to his stare. I could actually see those two getting along quite well. They were both tall, dark, and brooding. Maybe that’d be my new goal; matchmaking the two shifters.

  When it was my turn to walk, my breath caught in my throat at the sight of Diego
in a suit. Ricky and Bishop had looked good in their tux, but Diego owned his.

  His dark hair was slicked back, and his face was cleanly shaved. He had the top two buttons of the black dress shirt beneath his suit jacket undone. He’d completely forgone a tie unlike the other two. His red eyes sparked with a hint of desire as he watched me approach him, and I could’ve sworn I saw him bite his lip a little.

  I laced my hand into his crooked elbow. I got a whiff of his cologne and felt my mouth water at the smell. Why did he have to smell so damn good?

  “You look stunning,” he leaned in and whispered as we started to walk.

  I tried not to blush as we kept a steady pace. There were about thirty guests in attendance, most of them from either the club or the precinct, with Lucy’s co-workers and a few of her clients staggered throughout the crowd. I finally found Brahm sitting at the front row, a smile on his face as he saw us.

  “Right back at ya. You smell nice too,” I whispered back. I hadn’t meant to say that second part, but what the hell?

  He chuckled under his breath, but said nothing else. I gave Brahm a wink as we passed him, then took my place next to the alter.

  All of Lucy’s guys looked magnificent in their tuxes. Vex and Hollis sent me a smile when I blew them a quick, cheeky kiss; Sloan stuck his tongue out at me. When the wedding march began to play, all three of them stood straighter and snapped their attention to watch as Lucy appeared in the doorway of the manor. Her birdcage veil was in place, and her hands grasped a beautiful bouquet of black orchids and dusty colored roses.

  I felt the bloody tears threaten to roll down my cheek as she walked. It was so beautiful seeing everything put together and watching my best friend walk to the three men she loved more than anything.

  Though, as she got closer, I couldn’t help averting my eyes to Brahm, and then to Diego. Both of whom were watching me.

  I wasn’t sure how all of this was going to play out between the three of us, but one thing I knew for sure as I flicked my eyes back and forth between them.

  I’d slowly been falling for Diego since before even that kiss, and without a doubt I loved Abraham. I couldn’t choose between them if I wanted to. I wanted them both equally.