Polarity of Us Read online

  I gave him a questioning stare. “Where are we?” I asked.

  He motioned to follow him with his head and began to walk through a thicker portion of the trees around us.

  When he stopped, I walked around him to see where we were. I couldn’t have been more surprised.

  A small shack sat next to a pool of water that was steaming. The snow around the water was completely melted away with grass growing around it, making the spot look like it didn’t belong here. The shack looked newly built and only large enough for maybe two people to walk around comfortably without feeling claustrophobic. Behind it all was a backdrop of the mountains.

  The place looked magical.

  Bastian sauntered over to the pool and dove in. He flipped around in the water a few times then came back up. When he surfaced, he was no longer a bear. He was a very wet, sexy, naked man. The water was only deep enough to barely cover him from the waist down, showing off that glorious V-shape in his hips.

  “What do you think?” He asked with his arms raised up.

  “Uh…” What did he ask? Oh! The spot. “It’s beautiful. What is this place?”

  “It’s one of the spots I camp at when I decide to hunt as a bear. I discovered the hot spring while chasing a moose one day and knew I had to come back. I built the shack in case Addy came with me or if I decided to change back into my human form. I can sleep in the cold as a bear, but just as a human is pushing it.”

  “It’s amazing,” I replied, though I was looking at his body while I said it. I honestly wasn’t sure if I was talking about the spring anymore.

  He laughed and held out a hand for me. “Yes, it is,” he said, obviously pretending I was talking about the spring. “Now, undress that beautiful body of yours and join me.”

  Not needing much prodding, I quickly slipped from my clothes. I considered trying to be sexy and doing it slowly, but the second the cold touched my skin, I scratched that plan altogether. I raced over and submerged myself into the water, not even bothering to gauge the temperature on it. I sighed and sank down as it touched my chilled skin. It was perfect.

  Bastian waded over to me and wrapped his arms around me. He kissed me soundly on the lips, making me sigh again from the feel of him.

  This was heaven.

  After thoroughly making my body feel all the right things in that spring, Bastian and I got dressed and sat on some logs he had arranged around a small fire pit. The sun was beginning to set as he pulled out paper bag, a skillet, and a little music dock for his phone from his duffle. He set his phone on it and played some music then opened the bag.

  “I brought us some steaks and veggies to cook over the fire. And…” he sifted through the duffle again and pulled out a bottle of red wine and two glasses. “Wine.” He gave me a pleased grin and handed me a glass.

  My heart welled with emotion at how perfect he was making this date. I couldn’t have imagined anything more romantic than the setting sun, music, food, and wine. Add in the hot spring and the northern lights that would be gracing us, and I was done for. I’d never felt so romanced in all my life.

  I shivered a little as he poured me a glass of wine and went about setting up the fire. After getting it going, he went inside the cabin and came out with a blanket and set it around my shoulders. I smiled at him in wonder as he quietly went about cooking our food. I couldn’t take my eyes off him as I sipped my wine, wondering what I’d done to deserve such an amazing man.

  How could I have gotten so lucky to end up with him? He was beautiful inside and out. His love for his daughter warmed my heart, and his ability to be so light after the horrors he experienced with his family, only made me care for him more. I knew as I watched him there that I was completely in love with him in every way. Hell, I knew I loved him well before this moment. But I could never admit it to myself until now. I had grown to fear the thought of loving someone again after Matthew. I closed myself off from the possibility that that love was it for me.

  I was so wrong.

  I also decided in this moment, that I could never leave him. Where Bastian and Addy were, it would be my home. Nowhere else would compare to being right here in this moment, and no measure of time with them would be enough.

  “Thank you, Bastian,” I said to him softly. So much emotion past through my voice when I said it, he stopped and looked up.

  He knew I was thanking him for more than just this date. I was thanking him for everything.

  He set down his utensils and scooted over to sit closer to me. His hands came up and he framed my face. “You never have to thank me, Daisy. Being with you is a pleasure I never thought I’d have again. I wished for you every day since my heart accepted Eve’s death. I wished for you for me. I wished for you for Addy. And here you are.”

  I felt tears well up in my eyes as the words formed on my tongue. Words I could never take back, and would never want to. “I love you.”

  Bastian took a shaky breath in and stared deeply into my eyes before letting it out. “I love you too.” He pressed his lips to mine, kissing me deep.

  He didn’t even need to say those words. I felt them in his kiss. I felt them in every kiss he had given me. But hearing them was a song to my soul.

  He pulled away and brushed my hair behind my ear. “I think, I’ve loved you since that day on your porch while I fixed those wooden planks.”

  I gave a shaky chuckle between a small sob. “I think I loved you from the moment you got attacked by my coffee in the library.”

  He barked out a laugh and raised a brow. “The coffee attacked me huh? And why exactly was that the moment?”

  “Because, it was how my parents fell in love. Mom spilled food all over Dad when she bumped into him. Instead of being angry, he laughed. He knew then he loved her.”

  “That was why you laughed when you ran into me,” he stated, remembering my own reaction.

  “Yep. It made me think of that moment between them. I know it sounds silly, but it felt like fate. Like that moment marked you as the man I’d fall in love with.”

  He ran his thumbs along my cheekbones then leaned in and kissed me again.

  A flash of light had us pulling apart to look up. The Aurora Borealis shone brightly above us, bringing just a bit more magic to this night.

  We looked back at each other and smiled before kissing again.

  I only had to wait two days before I finally heard back from Lena.

  Bastian had gone to do a delivery in the next town, and Addy was playing at a friend’s. I had nothing else better to do, so I walked to the café to get a coffee and take some pictures of the town. I still hadn’t done that yet and wanted to send them to my dad.

  As I walked, my phone rang in my pocket. I quickly pulled it out and practically stopped breathing when it showed it was Lena.

  “Hello?” I answered cautiously.

  “Daisy Lennox! That was without a doubt one of the best books I have read in a long time! I loved it!” She exclaimed quickly.

  I couldn’t believe it. “You loved it?” I asked, trying to contain my shock. Lena never loved just any book. I sat down on one of the town benches, soaking up what she said.

  “Absolutely! The love between that polar bear man and the girl was captivating! I was on the edge of my seat the entire time. And the little girl polar bear was the cutest! How on earth did you come up with this idea?”

  I chuckled, thinking of how crazy she’d think I was if she knew the truth. “This place just brought it out of me I guess.”

  “Oh! And the man you used to make the cover! I don’t think I’ve seen a man that handsome since my trip to Paris. He puts those French men to shame!”

  I laughed at her enthusiasm for Bastian’s picture. I couldn’t resist using him for the cover. He didn’t mind, anyway.

  “We need to get this book on the market now, missy. It is going to hit bestseller with ease!”

  I about fell off the bench. “Really?”

  “Absolutely! I need you to come to my
office on Monday. We are going to go over the plan and get this baby put through the editor. The sooner we start up the process the better.”

  My excitement dissipated. “Monday? You want me there on Monday?” I asked.

  “Well, of course. I need you to sign your contract with us to get the ball rolling. I won’t have time after Christmas. There are several books I’ll have to go through, so now is the time to do it.”

  I chewed my lip nervously. I couldn’t just up and leave. Christmas was only a week away and I planned to spend it with Bastian and Addy. My dad even mentioned flying him and Lindsay up to spend it with me in the cabin. If I left, there was no telling if I’d be able to get flights back out here in time. “I’m not in Chicago, Lena. I’m still in Canada.”

  She huffed. “Well, you better get on a plane and get here as soon as possible before it’s impossible to catch a flight. I had no idea you were still there. It’s been over a month.”

  I sighed. I didn’t want to leave. Not now, not ever. I knew I’d have to go back eventually to get all of my things before moving her permanently, but that was supposed to be after Christmas.

  “I can’t make it there before Christmas, Lena. I promised to spend it here with my family and friends.”

  She cleared her throat. “Then I guess you will have to choose. There will be plenty of Christmas’s to come, dear. My offer is a one-time deal. You come before Christmas, or you will have to find someone else to publish your book.”

  I couldn’t believe the excitement she’d shown about my book. I knew the book was good and that it had all the things near and dear to my heart inside of it. But, I never expected it to be such a hit with her.

  However, the excitement I felt quickly faded away the moment she gave me the ultimatum.

  I had to go back to Chicago to get things rolling on the book being published, but that would mean leaving Bastian and Addy after promising them Christmas. I knew this moment would come, I just hadn’t expected it so soon. I didn’t want to leave them or this place. White Hemlock had become home to me and had everything in it that made me happy. Then again, writing books made me happy too. If I wanted to continue being successful with my dream job, I had to go back.

  Though, I knew without a shadow of doubt, that no matter if I went back or not, my heart would always be here. I loved Bastian. I loved being in his world and being with him and Addy. I missed being with Hannah, of course, but Chicago had never been home. There was nothing else for me there.

  I didn’t know how to handle this situation. Let alone break the news to Bastian that I would have to leave if I wanted this book published. How do you choose between your heart and your mind when they’re both screaming at you mercilessly to do two completely different things? Then again, my emotions had been on a crazy roller coaster ride the last week or two. The smallest things were making me cry and I wasn’t exactly sure why. Maybe it was just the stress of finishing the book and figuring out what would happen after it was done.

  I needed advice this time, though. I didn’t trust my own head with how out of whack I’d been. So, I did the only thing I could think to do.

  “Let me call you back. I have to look up flights to see if I can even manage it,” I told her.

  “Perfect! Be quick! I’ll be waiting for an answer.”

  I said bye then hung up, only to call the one other person I could think of to help me decide on what to do.

  My dad.

  He always knew how to help me when I was stuck. Whether it was with writing or with love, my dad always had the answers. I quickly dialed him, chewing on my lip as I waited for him to answer. He finally picked up on the fifth ring.

  “Hey, baby girl! I feel like I haven’t talked to you in forever!” He exclaimed happily.

  I laughed. “Hey, Daddy. I’m sorry it’s been a while since I called.”

  “Daisy, between your book and what’s going on with you and Bastian, I wouldn’t be calling me much either,” he joked.

  I laughed. “About the book,” I continued. “I finished it a few days ago and sent it off to my publisher. I just got a call from her, and apparently, she loved it and wants me to sign a contract immediately.”

  He gave a roar of excitement. “That’s amazing, baby girl! I knew you would do amazing with this one! I’m so proud of you!”

  I gave a humorless laugh. “Yeah. Me too.”

  He paused. “Wait. Isn’t this a good thing? Why do you sound so sad, sweetheart?”

  I sighed. “Well, yeah it’s good. It’s just...”

  He caught on to where I was going easily. My dad knew me better than even Hannah when it came to my emotions. “You don’t want to leave.” He stated matter-of-factly.

  “No... I want to stay. I love Bastian, Daddy. I love Addy. I don’t want to leave them behind. I don’t know what to do. My mind is reeling from the excitement of my book, but at the same time, I know my heart is in White Hemlock. How do I choose between a job I love and the people I love?”

  He gave a sad sigh. “It’s not an easy choice between what your heart wants and what your heart needs, Daisy. You love writing books and could still write them from there, but there’s no telling how your company would feel about that. They aren’t small time publishers. But, at the same time, I know what you feel for Bastian is deep. I know that if I was in your shoes and it was your mother, I’d have chosen her a thousand times over. Love like we had and what you have with Bastian and Addy, it doesn’t go away or dissipate. It’s infinite and it’s irrevocable. The question isn’t which decision you can live with. It’s which decision you can’t live without. What you want as opposed to what you need.”

  Tears sprang to my eyes at my dad’s words. The thought of losing Bastian and Addy scared me far more than the thought of never publishing a successful book again. How could I choose that over them? It shouldn’t even be a question. I wanted to be successful with my books. But, I needed Bastian and Addy like I needed water to survive.

  “I can’t live without them. I’d rather self-publish and hope for the best than leave them behind.”

  “No matter what you decide, sweetheart, you will always have me in your corner. If you decide to move there, then I’ll will bring my old ass to come visit you. Just make sure whatever you decide it’s what’s right for you.”

  I laughed and wiped away the tears. “Thank you, Daddy. I needed to hear that from you. You know me better than I know myself sometimes.”

  “Well, that happens when you leave your diary laying around as a kid for your old man to get all your juicy secrets.

  I huffed. “Dad, that is not even funny. You didn’t really do that, did you?”

  “Whoa! Look at the time. Gotta go, baby girl. You tell that man of yours hello for me.”

  I chuckled. “Ha ha, very funny. I love you, Daddy.”

  “Love you too, Daisy. You call me if you need me again.”

  “I will. Talk to you later.”

  We hung up and I took in a big gasp of air. Talking it through with my dad made making this decision so much more freeing. I would have to break the news to Lena soon. So, what if the company drops me? I would be just fine publishing on my own. I didn’t need a fancy publishing house. I just needed the man I loved and the little girl who had stolen my heart right alongside him.

  Nothing else mattered.

  Eighteen

  Bastian

  I couldn’t believe how great everything was going.

  Having Daisy in mine and Addy’s life had brought our grey world some color. Addy had smiled and laughed more than she ever had and it felt as if a weight was lifted from my chest. I still loved Evelyn, and probably always would, but Daisy gave my heart a new rhythm to beat at.

  And after us both admitted to our feelings, I had no doubt she wouldn’t leave us. It had been the worry that plagued me as we got closer. But now, the storm in me was calm. Well, for the most part. My bear had been surfacing a bit more than usual anytime Daisy was around. Which wasn’t exactl
y unusual, but he seemed alert about something. It didn’t make me uneasy, just confused.

  I spent most of the day working on a project I’d started for a couple looking for a unique dining room table. Addy was at a friend’s house playing, and I expected Daisy to come by later. My iPod blared Wolves Without Teeth by Of Monsters and Men as I worked. My table saw was loud, so the volume was turned up double to hear over it. I was bobbed my head to the music, lost in my own little world, when I thought I heard Daisy yelling my name. I switched it off and looked over my shoulder as I lifted off my protection goggles.

  I grinned widely at her and tossed my goggles and gloves on the table. She sidled up to me, then looped her arms around my neck and stood on her tiptoes to kiss me deeply.

  “I missed you this morning,” she whispered against my lips. God, I loved her lips. Kissing her was a damn addiction.

  I smiled. “I missed you too. Have you heard back about your book yet?”

  She let go and grabbed my hands in hers. “Actually, that’s why I’m here. I got a call from my publisher.”

  “And?” I prodded expectantly while giving her hands a squeeze.

  “She loved it!” She said happily.

  I let out a cheer and picked her up then spun her around. She giggled and held onto me tightly.

  When I figured she was probably good and dizzy enough, I set her down and kissed her cheeks and forehead excitedly. “That’s amazing, Daisy! I’m excited for you. What happens now?”

  “Well...” she hesitated. “That’s the shitty part... “

  My face fell, and I pinched my brows together in worry. What could possibly be bad about this? Her expression sent a chill of suspicion down my spine. Though, I didn’t understand where that emotion would come from. “Why? What’s wrong?” I asked her.